Baby Fever.... Damn you face book!

Dear Facebook,

When we first met, you were a good friend of mine. We spent a lot of time (maybe too much!) together. You helped me stay connected to people I didn't get to see very often, and gave me plenty of juicy gossip.

But then, something bad started happening. All of the people you were connecting me to were starting to get engaged, married, and worst of all, having babies. Now, I don't know if you've made some kind of law, but everyone having a baby posts all kinds of pictures: preggo pics, ultrasounds, and baby showers filled with little teeny tiny shoes, and yellow ducks.

A couple of months later, baby pictures start to appear. At first, they aren't much to look at. In fact, they kind of look like gigantic raisins, with their weird little scrunched up faces and pointy heads. But gradually over time, they start developing into these crawling, then walking little beauties. And they are always doing something adorable. They never post a picture of a poopy diaper or a screaming fit in the middle of a restaurant.

Facebook, today, another friend from high school posted an ultra sound pic, and frankly, I'm fed up. I just don't think its fair that you play with my emotions like this. Seeing all of this cute and cuddly crap is giving me some serious pangs of mommy envy, and YOU are responsible. I just don't understand why you do this to me. All I can do is picture myself next to a chubby, round faced smiling little mini me. I can't picture poop, or sleepless nights, or the insane amount of money they cost, and I just don't think that is very socially responsible of you.

Here is my plea... please take down those pictures, and NEVER ever let anyone else post them... or any kind of baby related announcement for that matter. This would be greatly appreciated, and I promise, I'll cut down on my puppy pictures if make this happen.

Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,

Chubby Teacher's Aching Womb